Sunday 22 September 2019

COMMUNICATING WAY UP THE SUCCESS LADDER

Who doesn't want to be rich, famous and powerful?

Who doesn't want to be successful? 

Success, to almost all of us, is being rich, famous and powerful. But are these the only manifestations of success? What happens when one hits the apogee? How does the CEO of a mega business empire seek to continue his rise in positional hierarchy? Does his success hit the wall? How does an individual, having become the premier of a super power continue his success story? Has he too hit the wall? Does the flux in the Forbes list indicate climb to and fall from success?  

Talk on the subject at MILIT, Pune
Irrespective of the organisation one works for or the society one lives in, everyone wants to succeed.  It is this yearning to succeed that drives humans to excel. Success, simplistically defined by dictionary as ‘accomplishment of a purpose or aim’, encompasses things much beyond mere achievements. It is perceived, understood and experienced differently by everyone. Thus, an attempt to contain ‘success’ in universal definition is an exercise in futility. Yet, to fathom its expanse there is a need to broadly define success.

“Success that Lasts”[i]

There is an unending list of publications and papers on various aspects of success. Market is flooded with books that prescribe easy ways to become successful. If all those who read it became half as successful, with so many dying to be rich, famous and powerful, there could be a stampede in every shop that sold such books and those who authored such books would either have already been hiding somewhere or spending time in captivity tutoring those who abducted them.

Amidst this maze of publications, a research paper titled “Success that Lasts” was published by Laura Nash and Howard Stevenson in Harvard Business Review issue of February 2004. It introduces, “Happiness, (Feelings of pleasure or contentment about life)”, “Achievement (accomplishments that compare favourably against similar goals others have strived for)”,  Significance (the sense that you made a positive impact on people you care about)” and “Legacy (a way to establish your values or accomplishments so as to help others find future success”, as four irreducible components of “enduring success”.

According to the paper, each factor, characteristically different, satisfies different needs of an individual and draws on distinctive emotional drives. Low probability of simultaneous and significant achievements in each of the four categories notwithstanding, the authors claim that deficiency in any one component makes success feel less real.

Abraham Maslow and Success

If one delves a little deeper into the article, on can correlate and superimpose the research findings over Abraham Maslow's hierarchy model. While ‘Achievements’ form the building blocks of success and caters initially to physiological needs, the accomplishments that achieve “significance’ relate to social and esteem needs. In further pursuits when one reaches higher in the hierarchy to sublime levels, legacies are created. If “happiness”, is not an integral element in the efforts of the individual, then, pursuit of success is likely to be short lived.

Secret of Success

There is something sinister in the way success grants audience. There are millions trying ‘tested’ and ‘proven’ ways and means but don’t ever get anywhere near success whereas there are few, seemingly with nothing, who break the ceiling. Business schools are flooded with such case studies. Their meteoric rise, in almost all cases, were fuelled by some USP. Like market dynamics that ensure high profit margins for USP driven goods and services, success adopts exponential path for ‘the unique’ while those copying proven success formulae must content with incremental growth. Though, copying "Habits of the Ten most successful People " would definitely help us understand successful individuals better, the outcome is normally a rich and happy author besides a reader looking out for more ‘easy ways’ to be successful.  Seldom discussed and often missed out is one trait common to all successful people, their power to communicate.

The secret of an individual’s success, embedded deep in his very being, is the manner in which he communicates. Communication referred to here, is not about glib smart talk, but about serious intra / inter personal communication and resultant actions.  Much like a powerful source of light that brightens large areas, meaningful effective actions and interpersonal communication can emanate only from strong foundations of intra personal communication.

Intrapersonal Communication

Intrapersonal communication is a form of self-talk between the subconscious and the self-conscious. For it to be effective, it must originate from competencies that have been identified or created and then nurtured and refined by meaningful catharsis that are guided by strong belief and convictions. If an individual finds happiness in this process, it eventually becomes a self-sustaining reinforcing cycle that promotes continually and consistently improving competence. The fundamental building blocks of success germinate from unique ideas backed by strong competencies and unwavering conviction in the probability of its success. Creating a rationale (why) is inevitable to sustain a pursuit that would turn arduous at some stage. It is this "why" that would fuel the fire that eventually creates legacies.

Empowering Intrapersonal Communication

The first and foremost requisite for fruitful intrapersonal communication is ‘belief in oneself’.  Despite all misgivings about oneself and negatives one would invariably receive in the arduous journey to the zenith, it is important to start believing in oneself, and steadfastly enough sooner than later.  After all, if one cannot truly believe in oneself, one cannot expect others to.  In order to reinforce self-belief, it is very important to repeatedly affirm faith in one's sense of purpose and abilities. This would swiftly lead to objective evaluation of one's own core competency and thereafter its improvement.

In order to remain committed and to persist with the success-journey, it is important that one restate one’s commitment as often as possible.  As time goes by one starts to hear the inner voice louder, clearer and more supportive. Soon, self-doubts ebb away and vanish, barbs and ridicules become inconsequential and the light within shines bright enough for others, first to see and then follow. Then, it is time to sow goals to reap success.

Setting Goals

It becomes easy to set goals in a clutter free realm of intrapersonal communication.  While setting goals, it is often the individual who limits his reach.  There is no end to dreaming big, thinking big and then reaping big.  It is difficult to aim high and miss it, but easier to aim low and hit it.  However, it will be easy and motivating, if goals are calibrated for the time ahead and written down, in as much specifics as specific can be. It would definitely help if these goals can be fed with the existing core competencies of the individual. Else time has to be set aside for achieving requisite competencies.

The Dubious Safety Net

Conditioned by value systems, self-doubts and fanned by fears of the unknown individuals become their worst critics and their own nemesis. Human brain is hardwired to ensure safe, smooth and obstacle free existential journey.  While it may risk inconsistencies occasionally, it normally forbids individuals from taking risks. Thus, human brains are conditioned to follow the ‘status quo’ providing us a path of least resistance. Sight of silent suffering majority subjugated by violent minuscule minority in communities across the world is the result of status quo brains that perpetuate “boiling frog” syndrome across cultures.

Status quo option apparently ensures one a safe journey in life, but it will certainly be as one faceless entity in a teeming million. In such a journey one can forget creating a legacy or of being any relevance. This, at its best, is existence and not living. Success in such a journey would be limited to meaningless longevity of life with nothing worth the time spent. In order to create something worthy of being called "success", one needs to get rid of the safety net, overcome fear of failure and pursue life with hope of success. It is often said that there are no hopeless situations but people who have grown hopeless about the situation. 

Interpersonal Communication

Armed with requisite competencies, standing atop strong foundations of value driven self-talk, safety nets can be cast off while dealing with the world outside.  This manifests as meaningful purpose oriented interpersonal communication. Self-belief and strong competencies naturally and effortlessly transform one's body posters and signals it sends out.  Contemporaries and competitors would without fail, take note of the strong sense of purpose and invincibility effortlessly emanating from such an individual.  Negotiations and bargains naturally turn in their favour and their ability to motivate colleagues and compel adversaries to fall in line becomes legendary. When one really stands on firm terra firma, there is no need to put on facades to hide inadequacies. While many who fake it, end up being arrogant, in the false belief that it could be seen as confidence.  But such masks seldom last beyond one meeting.

Climbing the Success Ladder

In order to climb a success ladder, it is important for one to first decide the legacy one wants to leave behind, to whom and to what extent one should become relevant.  One must then earnestly set out to acquire requisite competencies. The defining moment in the journey comes when one befriends one’s own subconscious and learn to harness its might through seamless communication. Casting out the fear of failure and setting out in the hope of success would help one achieve success that can truly be called legacy in one's own lifetime. The journey to success starts with the communication between the self-conscious and subconscious.



[i] Success that Lasts, Laura Nash and Stevenson Howard, Harvard Business Review February 2004

35 comments:

  1. A very incisive and very well articulated article. Yes.... There is no laid out highway to success. I agree that by just studying and analysing success stories all u can learn are common triats of successful people... Generally acheivable goal setting and sheer determination, a steely resolve and immense self belief are essential ingredients.
    The desire to acheive and ability to rise after every fall is a must. Inspiration-perspiration-desperation .... more or less in that sequence .... Is the highway. Success stories inspire and that's about all.
    Excellent article sir.

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    1. Not falling is impossible and raising one self up after each fall is the key
      Thank you very much

      Delete
  2. Great article,Jesus , achillis, Alexander, Ceasar, Gandhi, Genghis Khan,I always wondered why some names live on

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    1. They in their life time created legacies that time could not erase.
      "Lives of great men all remind us we can make our lives sublime"

      Delete
  3. Great article leading to identify the one's usp but also focuses on success that last

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  4. Belief in oneself without a firm belief in God is not a good idea. American self improvement articles talk of 'Yes, I can' not the good old 'God willing, I can'

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    1. Getting to know one's own subconscious is also a journey in sync with the creator. Yes You have a point

      Delete
  5. Wonderful article sir. The climb to success has one more factor which is the hunger or the ambition or the focus to achieve better and more. This continues till a zenith or contentment level from where you start climbing the reverse way

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    1. What happens to those who have reached the zenith? If they don't find higher goals to reach they climb down.
      You said it right

      Delete
  6. Very well written but this concept/path to success/happiness is based on the ideas that developed in Europe/America. This point of view is perfect/ideal as per the world view of the west specially in terms of achieving happiness and success. Their definition of achievement/happiness is self aggrandizement. Last 2 -3 generations of majority of the western countries have not seen/experienced deprivation. That is the reason that despite achieving everything through self aggrandizement 38% of European population and 25% of US population is on psychiatric medication, or has been on this medication atleast once in their lifetime. For them there is only one truth but for us there can be many truths. For us land and its resources are sacred but for them they are meant for exploitation. Diversity is the essence of our civilization and culture but they abhor diversity that is why they are not able to handle a few thousand immigrants. There are six schools of orthodox Indian philosophy. I suggest that you please have a look at what is their point of view. Frankly speaking I have not read them so far but I will definitely go through them after retirement so that I am in a better position to comment on such ideas.

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    1. Thank you for the very detailed response. The idea of subconscious and self conscious is universal and not confined to either Western or eastern world. Discussion here is to how one can tap into the subconscious and extract its potential to propel oneself into the orbit of success. In fact the article actually looks at meanings of success away from wealth position and mundane achievements. Hope you get time to read it at leisure.

      Delete
  7. Lal Varghese
    Great to read your article.Communication is the fundamental skill people has to keep on improving. Whether it is intra personal or inter personal or in public speaking.The best Part in inter personal communication is understand what is not being said. Listening others is the mother of communication.But very few only actually listening with heart and soul.The DAD part is also very important- deletion , addition , distortion.. You can heed others only when you accept the fact that others thinking and perception need not always wrong and ours need not always right.

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    1. Listening without evaluation is an important part of communication.

      What actually happens most of the time is that while we pretend to listen we barely hear somebody. We are already preparing our response and in the bargain we stop listening even before a sentence has been completed.

      You are right.

      Listening is as important as talking.

      Thank you very much for the detailed response

      Delete
  8. Definitely sir...what u brought out in the article, different people have different perception of success, still many end up being successful still unhappy.. every step we try to change its definition and get into Rat race of achieving more.. as u said sir,self love and belief must be key areas....impressive write up sir... Waiting for more...

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    1. Thank you very much for the detailed response.
      While the concept of success may be universal approach is as diverse as diversity can be.

      Delete
  9. Well structured and researched write up. Success at work as a subset of self actualisation in life should be taken up, when you deliver the lecture. Success also varies, depending on your work scenario and the general ethics of your work place. You are the one to measure your success. Stress on this, and the path to success gets easier.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you very much for the prompt response.

      I shall certainly keep in mind the aspects that you suggested in the talk.

      Delete
  10. A very beautifully articulated piece of excellence. There seems to be a list link once you talk of the Maslow's heirarchy of needs and explain/delve in the communication sphere. Perhaps what could fill/bridge the gap and give a flow is a word about the Id/ego human beings have, which dictate certain specific actions after reaching the self esteem stage (self actualization being far away). Overall very interesting.

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  11. Very correctly voiced. Communication be it interpersonal or intra personal is not happening the way it should amidst the daily grind though technology has made things so easy.
    I must add your communicating skill is just superb👌

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  12. Something always keeps me away from reading self help / success tricks kinda books. Rarely i browsed through, but never felt something catching. May be somebody else medicine may not suit me :)

    Thank you sir, for this wonderful piece of writing

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    1. Exactly.
      One man's meat is another man's poison.
      Self help books are good to incite and excite, that's it.
      Thank you very much

      Delete
  13. Dear Gen,
    Frankly I didn't find the article, arresting my attention . Success has many definitions and many more surrogate masters.Each one vyeing to be better than the other. I have only two great people to point out as enigmatic successful personalities. Dr Abdul Kalam and Mr E Sreedharan. Both thoroughbred professionals in their own field and worthy of emulation.
    Why are we setting the rules for success. Let each one define their own rules.

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    1. I agree with you on all your statements.

      Each one of us, like our individual opinions, is entitled to our own definition of success and there can be no doubt about it. The first section of the article actually tries to establish this very fact. The article discusses the concept of success that can become enduring through the four irreducible elements presented.

      The article does not lay down rules or advocate any approach for success and does NOT even by the faintest stretch take away an individual's right to define, measure and experience success in he manner he or she wants.

      As regards the articles inability to arrest your attention, i with sincerest humility accept my incompetence to give the requisite character to the text to hold attention of all those who read my articles, although as an author i would love to arrest, churn, excite and set on fire my readers thoughts.

      i shall strive to improve the content and zing.

      Delete
  14. A well researched article which calls for further introspection. As you rightly brought out Abraham Maslow`s Hierarchy of Needs lays down the ladder to success. As per his theory , the urge for satisfying needs is never ending. What I feel is that the theory needs to be viewed in a different light that attainment of each goal is a success by itself. Not every individual progresses to the ultimate stage of Sel Realization. However, in his view , he is quite satisfied with the level he has attained.
    Therefore, net net , the question remains whether Success is a State of the Mind or is it an invisible Stamp of Recognition given by other people creating an Aura of sorts ? I believe in the former philosophy `Success is a state of mind -that one has achieved whatever he has aspired for!
    Regards,
    Cdr Victor Joseph, Navy Rtd.

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    1. The moment one gives into others evaluation of oneself over one's own self-evaluation, the individual is tormented by the scary thought of 'What would others think of me?', happiness is a lost destination. one can choose between success with happiness or without it. while success for many is about money power, position etc they would sooner or later discover that they have lost both. that is why the concept of success on a daily basis could be an important way out.
      thank you sir for the very thought provoking input.

      Delete
  15. Very well written indeed.
    Very few have that unending desire to figure on the likes of the Forbes and many such other lists that rule the roost today. Getting to that level is not everybody's kettle . Most others are content with their own achievements and also have there own yardstick of measuring success.Money , power, success are not the be all and end all of life. Happiness is the key word and that can be attained only with a judicious mix of ambition and good sense. If one measures achievement and success by what the world think of you, then life can be merry hell and uncomfortable. Life is much more than all this.
    I for one am a happy person not because I have reached the pinnacle of success but because on a self appraisal , I feel is been a life lived well and thats what matters.
    Keep writing friend.

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    1. In fact what you said is the essence of life, a journey that one undertakes in quest of ones own contentment.
      You are right. Almost everyone evaluates success in comparison to what others ,who in our perception, are in similar state. rat race and its associated turbulence becomes the norm.
      Finding ones yardstick and evaluation according to it would be ideal to be in a state of bliss.
      Thank you very much for the beautiful piece

      Delete
  16. A very well analyzed article highlighting various issues contributing towards Success. Communication is a major contributor and I think we in the Armed Forces know it very well.In addition to the issues covered by you, compassion and dedication are equally relevant.Iloved going through the article. Regards

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    1. Thank you very much sir.
      The attribute that a leader must have, to be successful is compassion, I would add empathy.
      Without dedication there is no way ahead.
      Thank you sir for the encouragement

      Delete
  17. If your family grows or if you feel like expanding your house because of any reason, you would always have the chance to do so because of the extra land. home

    ReplyDelete

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