A Table Full of Dishes ; Sanu Ki?

 Ubiquitous Affliction

“Sanu ki,” a usage in Punjabi, is both a phrase and an idiom. “Sanu” translates to “us” and “ki” means “what.” Together, it merely means “to us, what” or in other words “why bother?” Simply put it means “I don't care.” That is where it stops being a phrase. Depending upon the context, “sanu ki?” assumes many a meaning. Commencing from being a plain expression indicating disassociation, it can mean anything like irrelevance, irreverence, scorn, and at times the sublime state of acceptance of the inevitable. One needs to spend time with people who speak Punjabi to capture the essence of the “sanu ki” served. It can mean anything depending on how, when, and where it has been said and to whom it has been delivered.  The difference in tone can change the associated meaning. The versatility of this phrase or idiom is what caught my attention.

In Malayalam, my mother tongue, there are different versions of ‘sanu ki?” Starting from “namukku enthiru de? to “nammaku entho venam?” words, tones, etc continue to change as we travel up north, from the southern tip of Kerala.  I am sure there would be something equivalent in all languages and different versions, within the same language, depending on the local dialect. Irrespective of the language, or its local dialect they all essentially mean the same, “sanu ki?”

Harmless as it may sound, it can pack a deadly punch when it becomes an attitude. Some, having got away with it for some time, become “cordycyeped[i]” by this attitude. Irrespective of the size of the organisation or its field of operations, if even one member of the team becomes infected, then it is likely to spread to other members sooner than later, spelling disaster for the organisation.

Disaster Everyone Shut Their Eyes To

Established in 1985, Enron became a multi-billion-dollar behemoth. Everybody was sure about its future, or everybody thought so till it declared bankruptcy. The company was packed with talents. They were masters of the ruthless pursuit of profits. There was nothing stopping them anywhere and in whatever they attempted to do. Yet, Enron fell and when it fell, it fell like a pack of cards because something that talents could not prevent pulled it down from the inside.

Postmortem dissection revealed that a few at the top had lied deliberately and some around them colluded while the many other equally talented kept quiet about it. They all individually were afflicted with “sanu ki.” More than the greed of a powerful few at the top, the fall was ensured by the silence of many who could stop it but chose to abdicate. It is said that it is not the violence of the few that kills a society but the silence of the many. 

Cost of Collusion

Most of us find it difficult to speak up even when we know that the path or the decision being taken by the organisation, we are part of, is wrong. We could be worried that by speaking up we could be seen as anti-establishment, end up damaging hierarchical relationships, and spoil our chances within the organisation. Under such circumstances “sanu ki” is the path most of us normally choose. “Sanu ki” killed Enron. Dissection of organisational failures across the world would reveal that “sannu ki” was the ailment that finally killed all of them. If we look around, we can see many people within our families, organisations, and societies remorselessly abdicating their responsibility, to tell the truth. If we muster the courage to look within, we can see many instances where we too have abdicated. We can go to any extent to be seen to be nice without realising that if “sanu ki” can decimate organisations and societies it can destroy us too. The sad part of it, we actively collude with others either for favour or out of fear.

It is easy to compliment someone successful. It is easier to ignore a flaw and let it pass by when it does not impact us adversely. There are many who even at the cost of discomfort keep quiet when they see things go wrong. Most of us desist from giving the correct picture or feedback to those whom we know for fear of offending or spoiling the existing relationships. Anyone who musters the courage and gives suggestions that are contrary to what we believe in is considered offensive and even inimical. Most of us avoid such people.

On the receiving side when things have gone irredeemably beyond, the very same people who chose to be nice through silence would be the first ones to come forward with an “I told you so,” or an “I knew it.” We are conditioned to be nice to the extent of allowing our near and dear ones to fail. Luckily for this world, not everybody believes in sannu ki. Some do bite the bullet.

Bite The Bullet

Recently, on my social media page, I posted a picture of a few dishes laid out on a dining table. Many of my friends liked it and some even posted comments.

One message bucked the trend. "What do I make out of this Picture? What is it all about?" came the private message from my friend in Canada. What is so difficult in understanding a picture?" I thought. many had already seen, put their likes, and even commented. That was my instant response. I did not feel good at all. I tried to justify my act and refrained from giving any weight to his argument.

I had been blunt all my life. I had fallen foul with many for rightfully telling them what I thought was wrong with them or in what they did. Few well-wishers advised diplomacy. I tried but like all half-hearted attempts, it failed. I knew that many in the hierarchy avoided me because of my reputation. Interestingly, I was handpicked by two Director Generals only because of this reputation. I also rose in the hierarchy. I continued to be what I was. If I had chosen to be blunt then, I must give that right to others, now and always too.

After the initial discomfiture, I looked at the picture. He was correct.  Without context, the picture looked meaningless. If you want to understand how awful it was, just try switching on any Indian movie song sequence, preferably one that you have never seen before, switch off the audio, and try watching. I felt the same about the picture I shared without annotation. Most people who liked and commented on the picture must have given it their own context. Were they being kind or were they merely exercising their option of “sanu ki?” Either way, I was happy with all of them.

The Chinese Dinner My Daughter's
Mother-in-law so painstakingly
prepared for us 

On the other hand, here was a man who took time out very early in the morning, risking the friendly relationship we had forged over time, to tell me that I had fallen short. I knew it was straight from the heart and with the sole intent of correcting me regardless of what I felt. I immediately sent him a message of gratitude and made corrections to what I had done. I checked my previous posts. Most of them were without any reference to context, just like the movie song sequence that had no audio to accompany. They all had many likes and comments too. All my incomplete posts seem to have met with people who exercised their choice of  “sanu ki?” 

Today, people find it difficult to point out mistakes. Parents find it difficult to advise or correct even their own children for fear of repercussions. Imagine the damage we are inflicting on ourselves. We forget that “sanu ki” returns to bite.

Human Beings and Human Doings

Recently, a friend gave a talk about “human beings and human doings.” The content of the lecture is her intellectual property. The title set me thinking. I am convinced that it was ‘human doings’ that helped us evolve into human beings and it is in these very ‘doings’ that we, as a society or species, will either flourish or flounder. ‘Sanu ki’ goes against the grain of collective survival.

“To err is human,” didn't someone say? 

"To correct is even more human," I feel.

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[i] ‘Cordycyeped’ is a concept that I had discussed in my previous blog published on Jun 15, 2022. The link to it is given here.   

https://jacobshorizon.blogspot.com/2022/06/beware-you-could-be-cordyceped.html

American Chop Suey Syndrome

 "I am ready. Let us go," said my wife when I reached home from the office. It was a 'half day' in the office and I did not have to return to work. We had decided the previous day itself that we would be eating out that noon.

Tezpur in 1987 was not like what it is now. There were not many eating places to choose from. We reached Tezpur only a few months before and had not yet explored the place. I also had not received much PCK (Previous Course Knowledge) about the place. PCK, in the army, refers to the inputs including notes, old question-papers and other tips, normally a senior gives to the junior in the same regiment or unit, about a training course he or she had attended. Over the course of time PCK extended its reach and now covers almost everything that one passed on to a new arrival or junior in the regiment or unit. Obviously, not many in the unit had gone out to eat. There were reasons. Officers and their families mostly went out in the evenings after office hours and came back late after dinner. The law and order situation prevailing then was not considered safe enough for evening outings. Moreover, Tezpur was away from the unit. 

Mobile Phones and Google Maps were not even distant dreams those days. With absolutely no PCK in hand, the only other way to find a good restaurant was to actually try out each one physically. Driven by hunger and not one to upset my lady, I decided to explore. It was also my first trip out to the town. I had just my sense of direction and the will to persevere to help. I kicked my Royal Enfield bullet to life and set out with my wife and child. Tezpur town was a good half an hour's drive. We drove through the empty road, reached the town and looked around. We couldn't find any 'good looking' places to eat in. With hunger pangs taking over, I homed on to a small little place where a bright board hanging outside said in English, "Chinese food". 

I stopped my bike and asked the guy, sitting outside the rickety restaurant, if they served lunch. The guy was very friendly. He called us right inside and seated us. We were the only ones. We were very hungry. The fastest he could give was a plate of 'Hakka' noodles. We ordered a plate to quell our hunger. We love trying out new dishes. We asked him what he could make special for us. 

He suggested that we try American Chop suey. I had not heard of this dish before and the name sounded intriguing enough to be experimented with. It was ironic that the two sworn class enemies, capitalists and the communists, came together to make something edible.  Both of us had never tried it before. We placed the order for the first plate of American Chop Suey of our lives. It had soft noodles , topped with fried noodles and poured over it was a rich tomato sauce. over it rested an egg bulls eye, perfectly done. We both fell in love with the rich sweet, sour and filling concoction. That was in 1987. Ever since, whenever we go to a restaurant that serves Chinese fare, we order a plate of American Chop Suey. 

It has been 36 years! We have tried American Chop Suey at countless restaurants all over India. We tried it in Thailand, Singapore and Malaysia where I thought I could get authentic American Chop suey. We  ordered it even in America. But not one has ever measured up anywhere near the American Chop Suey*, we ate in that little wayside eating place that day. Our children have grown up. They now treat us to dinners. When they take us to restaurants where Chinese fare is served they invariably order American Chop Suey hoping that we will, one day, find something like our first plate of American Chop Suey. 

Yesterday, my wife and I were sitting and enjoying a bowl of Thukpa she had prepared. I brought up the topic of 'that plate'  of American Chop Suey. “That American Chop Suey is a huge lesson for life," I told her. She looked at me quizzingly. I reiterated, "Yes. There is a huge lesson for life in our search for the ‘that’ American Chop suey". In fact it is the ultimate tool to  understand problems in personal life and interpersonal relationships. I call it the American Chop Suey Syndrome**. Let me explain.

The American Chop Suey we ate in a roadside ramshackle restaurant in 1987 might or might not have been the ultimate.  It tasted great and we were hooked on, for life.  Why? There are physiological, psychological and emotional reasons

We were very hungry. In a place we were not familiar with and struggling to find a place worthy to eat, we found a place with something to eat. Our physiological needs were immediately and completely met. It also addressed our fears and state of uncertainty. Our psychological needs were addressed. The person was very friendly and helpful. He saw to it that he first gave something to eat and then took time to make that chop suey. Our emotional needs of being specially cared for were also met. It was the first time we tasted a chop suey, adding  novelty to the experience.  Solace from hunger, secure feeling in a  place where we were total strangers, a sense of being cared for and the novelty of the dish created a halo around ‘that plate  of American Chop Suey’ making that experience uniquely beautiful and unforgettably tasty. Even today, it remains our most beautiful dining experience. That, to us, also remains the benchmark for dining experience. 

Though we haven't found ‘that very same’ Chop Suey, we have enjoyed excellent Chinese fares including American Chop Suey at many places. Comparison is inevitable but we haven't allowed comparison to mess up our dining experiences. We have come to terms, but the search continues. Allowing that one unique experience, in the distant past to mess up with the present is the most potent prescription for disaster. This is what actually happens in our daily lives and in our interpersonal relationships.

We know a few people, each of them amazing in their own ways, but having chosen to live in shells of misery of their own making. They are in perpetual search of that ‘American Chop Suey’, sitting at the dining table called life and messing up the current dining experience called ‘present’ paving way for a terrible experience, called tomorrow. They have chosen to walk forward looking backwards. Fall is inevitable. 

Once we experience something  good or bad we cannot wish it away or forget it, however hard we try. It just remains there, sometimes in the conscious and mostly in our subconscious. Interestingly, the recordings of the subconscious mind predominantly influences our decision making, our ability to process  and experience the present and plan our future. 

Many love affairs that culminate in marriages are potentially vulnerable to American Chop suey Syndrome. The partners during the novelty phase of courtship subconsciously record unique experiences and establish benchmarks for the other. Everything done later is vetted against the Chop Suey benchmark. Unfortunately the reality of life is starkly different from fantasies of romance but comparisons do not cease to exist. The oft heard phrase, “he was not like that” or “she was not like that '' are classic symptoms of the person suffering from ‘American Chop Suey Syndrome’. Sadly, longer the courtship, more likely the syndrome and more severe the impact.  Many courtships that do not eventually end up in permanence might also have been afflicted by American Chop Suey Syndrome to start with. Novelty wears off first, followed by dilution in emotional support, deterioration of psychological congruence and lastly physiological necessities. This order of degradation actually allows people to linger on in misery of dysfunctional relations longer than they should be.

It is not only confined to love affairs, marital relations or interpersonal relationships. It wreaks silent devastation in intrapersonal affairs. Secretive, selfish, insecure, violent, perverted people and liars are likely to be severely afflicted with American Chop Suey Syndrome. Most of them are likely to have suffered some childhood trauma creating indelible imprints that become benchmarks against which the individual evaluates every conversation, activity or incident. Responses from that person are aimed at addressing the need. They make a shell of misery for themselves and spread misery for others too.

interestingly, all of us do suffer from varying levels of American Chop Suey Syndrome. It is natural and to some extent required too. Most of us will turn around and deny its presence.  Denials apart, it is for us to decide whether we should be  sitting at the table of life and lament the shortcomings of the fare called today against what we wanted or just enjoy what we have. 

I enjoy my today, the way it is. I am also in search of a better tomorrow. I am also in search of 'that' elusive plate of American Chop Suey.

*With all respects to all the chefs who prepare American chop suey all over the world, my article is

in no way an insinuation or insult  to your capabilities. It is a personal experience and a lesson that

I have drawn for myself and one that i constantly tell people whom i train or help with to deal with

problems in their life

**This is purely my observation. It has NO scientific study to back up. You may look around and

decide for yourself. I didn't find any reference to the “American Chop Suey Syndrome’ on the net.

The Cat School and A Crown I Refuse to Give

It was quarter past 7 in the evening. Anne and I  were seated on the veranda chairs for our daily dose of post-dinner conversation. The day had been very warm. A cold moist breeze gently blew in. “It's raining somewhere,” I said. She didn't reply. She put a finger over her lips and then pointed towards the cat on the road.

We live in a gated community. The colony road, at its broadest outside our house, serves as a tiled pad for turning vehicles. The mother cat was there with her kitten. A child in the colony had brought the mother cat into the colony as a kitten. She was smart and grew up to be a beautiful cat. Ever since, tomcats in the neighbourhood viciously vie with each other for her affections. She litters regularly. 

Seated majestically, she had a rat under one of her paws. Her kitten sat curiously watching the rat struggling to escape. Without warning, she let the rat free. What followed was a hunt in slow motion. The rat ran for its life. The kitten seemed lost. Mama chased the rat, caught it, returned to where she was and settled down. Then without warning she released the rat again. The kitten chased the rat  but failed to catch it. Mama wouldn't let the lesson end in failure! The lesson was repeated a few times. The rat also must have got tired of futile attempts to escape. Finally, the kitten got it right and caught its first feast. “Efficient teacher,” remarked my wife. 

Jungle demands survival skills and matriarchs invest a lot in enabling progenies. What about us ? I wondered. 

There are more than one answer to each question in life. They are present around us. But it reveals itself only if one has the eye to see, ear to hear, head to decipher and heart to relate. I had my chance. This issue had come up for post-dinner discussion a few days before the ‘cat’ incident.

A friend of mine had recently ventured into the field of business. An attempt to start something, especially a business, that demands a lot of physical and mental commitment when one is well past sixty, the decision and follow through, the least to say, is incredible. My friend had retired from the army where he held a very senior position. He had a pension and could spend his days pursuing his passion. I was proud of him. “What prompted you to start this?” I asked. “See Jacob; I couldn't have handed over my designation to my son. But in business, I can anoint my children,” he replied. 

Awash with guilt for a moment,  I realised that I had done nothing like that for my girls. All along when they grew up, they were guaranteed only facilitation for their education. They had to be on their own for everything else. They did exactly that. They chose the field they wanted and toiled hard. One a Masters in Business Administration and CS and the other an IITian, they never disappointed me. They roughed it out in the wide open world and found their space.

Did I fail my children? 

Enabling progenies by creating a conducive environment is a parenting responsibility. Empowering them to achieve their goals is a step ahead. They have the authority to decide for themselves. They have the responsibility and therefore the accountability to themselves for what they have become or haven't. Handing over a crown and anointing them was never on my agenda. Did I abdicate my responsibilities?

There was no reason for me to grudge his reasons but his cause was at great variance with my convictions. Right and wrong is a matter of perception, a considered choice of every individual. He  might be right. 

Was his endeavour a pursuit of passions or driven by compulsions? Passions could be compelling but can compulsions become passions? Maybe!

It is said that survival is the toughest in The Savanna. Life and death are in an undetachable embrace there. Every death in Savanna sustains many others' life and every living thing, flora or fauna, is a potential death threat to another. Each mother in the wild Savanna knows that chances of survival of offspring depend solely on their ability to defeat death at every corner and every moment. We comfort ourselves in the belief that such life is confined only to the wild. We call it ‘Law of the Jungle’!

Think again. We could be wrong. They may be better off than we think.  A close look will reveal that odds stacked against human species are far more than that we currently comprehend. According to one study, the entire human population is cramped into less than 1.5 million square kilometers, a mere 1% of the total habitable land on the planet where as the wild animals have about 40 million square kilometers a whopping 38% as Forest. We normally speak about endangering other species by encroaching into their space, but remain silent and criminally oblivious to the unpardonable death and destruction we cause to our own species in the quest for religious, political or economic dominance. In such an environment, shouldn't we be enabling our offspring far better and more seriously than the mothers in the wild?

Unconsciously, it is the same parenting instinct, as in the wild, but greatly skewed that compels us to create tangible assets to be handed over to our offspring in the belief that they will take it forward and hand it over to their offspring. Unfortunately, inadequately enabled and insufficiently empowered, the recipients soon waste out the assets.

“पूत कपूत तो क्यों धन संचे,; पूत सपूत तो क्यों धन संचे" wasn't said in vain.  

Creating assets in pursuit of one's own passion is great, but driven by compulsions to crown the progeny may not always yield intended results. Each Empire and each Kingdom of the past bears testimony to this profound truth.

Pursuit is a personal choice and compulsion a state of helplessness.

I have no crown to handover.

Additional Input

For those interested

The planet can be divided as follows

Land mass -149 Million Square KMs ( 29%).

Oceans   - 361 Million Square Kms (71%).

Of the total landmass  (149 Million Square KMs)

106 Million Square KMs (71%) is habitable.

 15 Million Square KMs (10%) is Glacier

28 Million Square KMs (19%) is Barren Land

Of all the habitable land in the world (106 Million Square KMs )

48 Million Square KMs (46%) is used for Agriculture.  

40 Million Square KMs (38%) is Forest

<17 Million Square KMs (14%) is Shrubs

>1 Million Square KMs (1%) is settlement and Infrastructure

>1 Million Square KMs (1%) is Freshwater

Harvesting Cognitive Dissonance

 Go Along 

Comical acts online or on TV, invariably comes along with an abundant dose of ‘canned laughter [1]’. We might miss the joke but not the laughter. Sooner than later, we too tend to laugh along; even when we don't quite get the joke. Our compulsion to go along is more pronounced when there are people around!  

WhatsApp group discussions play it out best. Anyone could have initiated it but inevitably, it gravitates to align with the opinion of an individual or a group of individuals. Initially there could be many widely differing views; strong, loud and clear. As discussions progress, differing voices either fall in line, or just fade into silence. Views that differ from the majoritarian are gradually given up, willfully or under pressure. It is not always necessary for the majoritarian opinion to be correct legal or valid, yet everyone goes along! Don't believe it ?

Revisit previous discussions on your mobile; it could provide undeniable proof! You can easily identify the dominant ones, the dormant mutes and the browbeaten. Eventually everyone tends to go along; to be in the group.  

Two seemingly isolated events but connected by a profound human compulsion called cognitive dissonance; the compelling desire to be with the dominant majority! 

 

Do We Always Go Along  

When our thoughts run contrary to the one predominantly held there is a sense of discomfort within us and we are driven to address it. The easiest way is to align oneself with the majority in view. Individuals to start with, homes, society and even Nation States are not exempted from this behavioral aspect. The degree and intensity of the dissonance experienced differs from person to person. More rooted one is to one’s belief, higher is the intensity of discomfort. If the dissonance has existential risk attached, likelihood of ‘going along’ is stronger.  After all North Koreans adore their leader!  

What happens when there is no existential threat? 

 

Conscience versus Pragmatism 

Mob lynching has become a common occurrence in many places. Individually nobody likes to kill or be killed. But seldom do we find anyone from within trying to prevent the mob from lynching the hapless. At least momentarily conscience of each individual in the mob goes dead.  

Many a time, people tend to go along even when they know, what they're going along with, may not be right. The discord within one’s conscience is often drowned in rudimentary survival need of being part of a group; the predominant human trait that helped us survive the wild, create societies and nation states and even wage wars against one another! Deeply imprinted into our genes, as an acquired  trait and perfected in the course of one's life, giving in to the majoritarian view guarantee us our place in the group and provides a sense of protection irrespective of what we hold as right or wrong. After all; it is more important to be alive to fight another day for another cause that may be more important to us: though that day may never come! In the choice between living by one’s conscience and being alive, spine gives way to survival instincts.   

The debate necessarily need not be on survival issues. Yet; it is it easier to be part of a group even though one knows that the group’s view or decision is wrong. It is our innate quality that draws us closer to the group even against the call of our conscience, justifying the unjustifiable. Those who stand firm by their conscience are either expelled from the group or forced to get out. They either perish in solitude or emerge separately creating groups that hold another set of views seemingly driven by their conscience. This is the path seldom trodden.  

Understanding Majority

Majority may not necessarily be defined in numerical sense always. One strong man can create a majority being the nucleus. Others, join for selfish reasons and the bulk, is made up of people often referred to as silent majority. They are there for fear of being seen holding contrary views. They easily shift to another power center when the wind blows that way. 

Driven by incompetence to voice, impotence to stand up and be heard, they are easily afflicted by cognitive dissonance. Organisations, associations and such bodies are infested with such people; certainly selfish and often scheming.   

Can Cognitive dissonance be productively channeled? 

 

The Mantra for Corporates

Getting teams to deliver and meet deadlines is one aspect that every organization wants. While diversity in skills, domain expertise and opinions add to the quality of options generated, success depends on convergence of thoughts post decision on the way forward and unity in action thereafter. Cognitive dissonance can be ‘managed’ effectively without impinging on individual’s esteem and eroding his skill set and willingness to deploy it. If such a conducive climate is created it can help the organisation reap rich.  

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[1] Canned laughter or laugh track is the pre-recorded laughter inserted into a audio or video programme. It is essentially a cue for those watching or listening to laugh.

Milk Negativity for Gains

 

Exhortations

The most repeated exhortation in motivational and corporate training circuits is about remaining positive’ irrespective of circumstances. Having been on the circuit, I have done it, many times over.  But talks about positivity is meaningless unless we understand negativity, its contours and content and context.

Negativity is everywhere. Overt or covert in application, crass or sophisticated in execution, words or deeds its manifestation, its existence recognised within or experienced from outside, negativity comes in countless shades and has little in common to call as character. Inseparable companion for some, identity for few, fuel for aggression or weapon of defense for many, we encounter negativity in some form every day.

Interestingly, people reeking of negativity complain most about others’ negativity.

 

Power of Negativity

I realised the power of ‘negativity’, first time in the mathematics class. We were attempting to solve a linear equation. When answers were called in, we found ourselves in two camps. All of us noticed the negative sign but most of us ignored its implications and turned in wrong. The vigilant few who recognised its power took appropriate steps turned in right.

Life is like that; you ignore negativity to your peril. It is omnipresent. Success and happiness to a large extent depends on how well, one can recognise and manage negativity in life’s equations. Unmanaged, it can be overwhelming. Negativity can impact personal life, as also play significant roles in shaping social issues and its outcomes.

Irrespective of its nature and purpose, negativity commences with and from individuals. Whether it is out of an inherent psychological disorder and consequent delinquent compulsions or as an element of purpose, it needs perpetrators and victims; person, persons or groups. Easily weaponised, it can vitiate even the most pristine and benign of environments.

Negativity, becomes a weapon of menacing potency, only if it finds conducive mediums and through them attain the threshold kinetic energy. It is true for individuals, groups, organisations and society.

Weaponising Negativity

Most of us, if not all, suffer from bouts of negativity. It is a natural survival kit that warns us of threats. It kick-starts instincts to survive adversities. Apprehension and anxiety we experience are negativity elements, but extremely useful survival tools. But when negativity persists and becomes the identity and predominant trait of an individual, it is a problem.  Individuals become negative mostly out of unaddressed inadequacies.

Negative outlook, in most cases, is a carryover of abusive childhood, intense physical or psychological trauma suffered anytime in life or flawed upbringing. From the cause and effect perspective, negativity comes from deep sense of insecurity. Responses may vary.

Negative individuals tend to see threat where none exists. Even in the best of situations they can create monsters, play spoilsport, experience discrimination, imagine apocalypse and seed and spread disharmony where such eventualities are otherwise impossible. Some of them do it deliberately and others do it by compulsion. Low on self-esteem,  most of them unsocial and at times anti-social, some withdraw into shells they create, few turn quarrelsome and violent but most are content being selfish and manipulative; and seem to gain immense pleasure even from small acts of disturbances they cause. Mistrust and being untrustworthy are sure signs of deep-rooted negativity. Education, economic status, job profiles or place in the social ladder don’t matter.  Apparently leading normal lives and earning livelihoods, they infect the environment they live in.

Look around; one may find such people.

Negative people seldom recognise their plight. Most of them live in denial, oblivious to their own misery and the misery they spread. Few weaponise it to achieve short-term objectives oblivious to long-term losses.  When others are inconvenienced because of them, they become convinced of the effectiveness of their strategy, only to compound their illness further. Those who can, avoid them and those who can’t, suffer fait accompli.

 

Harvest From Negative Narratives

Negativity is contagious and easily spreads through association. It is the most effective means to get messages across big audiences.

It is natural to view existential threats with apprehension. If such a narrative is created and propagated, it spreads and grips the community. Each individual, if not extremely diligent, by instinct becomes a medium and diligence is a rarity.  More the mediums, more virulent becomes negative narratives. Initially only a few may add content but as is wont, mass gets added arithmetically in the beginning, geometrically then and imaginatively exponential thereafter. 

There are people who thrive milking negativity. Many politicians and religious teachers, world over, exploit their ‘subjects’ deliberately injecting negativity. When the group is fed narratives of an impending doom, mostly conjured and propped up with lies dressed as truth, the threat looks real. The group, then naturally listens. Those who bite the bait not only believe in the ‘negative’ but go around baiting others. World across, the wily have come to power using this magic formula.  

Once ‘we’ and ‘they’ are defined, minds become fertile grounds for negativity. Almost all contemporary political campaigns across the world effectively uses negativity to garner votes. Social media proliferation is a boon for virulent spread of such narratives. Spreading fear about after-life consequences or threat from other religions or even sects within, some religious leaders harvest money, fame and power from negativity.  Growth of most cults, if mapped, often reveal underlying threads of ‘negative’ narratives

Group-negativity, initially is confined to words. However it soon turns into deeds and left unmanaged become reprisals against the ‘other’. The silent many who remained content being spectators sooner than later become participants and perpetrators. The holocaust is a grim reminder to humanity of what negative narratives can yield but time seems to have numbed our senses.

Ironic but true; though negativity starts when objective logic fails, its only logical reasoning that can put an end to negativity. Unfortunately, reasoning dies a few deaths with those taken in by negativity. It is not only the illiterate, ignorant poor that make the gullible crowd but even educated well-placed individuals stream-in, “ever hearing but never understanding”, “ever seeing but never perceiving”.

Is there a way out of the marauding negativity?

 

The Equation

Constructing cause and effect equations to understand situations help deal with negativity. But people drowned in negativity seldom see the life-rope. Persistent chipping away at the causative factors does help but negatives have a strange overpowering presence.

A blot on a clean apparel, however small catches the eye first.  Despite the large clean canvas around the blot often refuses to let the eyes go. Notional or imaginary losses have the same impact. Having made riches off paltry investments, people fret about the falling stock indices. Industrialists, taking their own lives having suffered losses, would not have thought even once about the growth they charted their way up and the huge growth possibilities ahead. Engrossed in the web of negativity they spin about themselves, they distance themselves from any meaningful help only to be fatally consumed.

It is absolutely normal, to feel the burden of negativity. It is good to be aware of the negative within. Willingness to accept its presence within and address it helps us turn in right at the end of the linear equation. Ability to identify negativity outside increases the probability of successfully negotiating it.

The equation is simple, straight and linear. Whoever has eyes, let them see!