When Silence Prevails

 

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Now to the topic of the Day - When silence prevails, 

“Fools rush in where angels fear to tread.”

“There is wisdom in silence.”

“Learn to listen.”

“Silence is Golden.”

“Do you always have to speak?”

“Can't you keep quiet?”

“Why should you speak for him?”

Irrespective of our nationalities, it is likely that we grew up having heard one or more of the above statements or questions. These are a few of the dictums that conditioned us to accept silence as a sign of civility and internalise it as willingness or agreement. 

Silence is the most misunderstood human response. “Mounam Sammada Bhaavam”, they say in Malayalam. It means, “Silence is agreement or acceptance.” Across cultures, silence is considered akin to wisdom and commands far more dignity than spoken words. On many occasions, we choose silence as a response, even when we know the other person is wrong and hurting. Ironically, we remain silent to avoid offending or hurting that very same person. Choice of silence as a response is either out of compulsion or for convenience. When fear stalks, silence is the easiest option. 

The dialogue from the Hindi movie Sholay captures everything about us being conditioned to accept silence as a safe response. “Yehan se pachaas-pachaas kos door gaav mein, jab bacha raat ko rota hein, toh maa kehati hein, beta so jaa, so ja. Nahi toh Gabbar Singh aa jaayega.” {“यहां से पचास-पचास कोस दूर गांव में, जब बच्चा रात को रोता है, तो मां कहती है, 'बेटा, सो जा, सो जा... नहीं तो गब्बर सिंह आ जाएगा।” (It just means, far-far away in the villages, when kids cry at night, the mother tells them, child go to sleep, or else Gabbar Singh will come.”  

Silence is not a natural response but an acquired trait. When we were babies who did not know a single word, we made all the required noises to let people know how we felt. Slowly, we were taught to suppress our responses, and silence was the easiest but also the most repressive. It is our conditioned choice of convenience to avoid unfavourable consequences that eventually pave the way to our becoming inconsequential. Silence is the golden route to escape, albeit temporarily. Silence has a language of its own. It is uniquely personal. We often seek refuge in silence to keep discomfort and disadvantage away. Silence of the lamb does not save the flock from slaughter, but it can least give the butcher nightmares. 

Silence is not solitude. Solitude reflects, whereas silence withdraws. Contrary to the common belief that silence is wisdom running deep, I believe it is generally a symptom of fear and helplessness. Silence masquerades as agreement, harmony and apparently reduces conflicts. In life, it only postpones the resolution of issues, prolongs misery, deepens discomfort, and leaves consequences delayed but mostly unchanged. Unfortunately, however well-thought-out silence may be, whatever elicited silence is certain to revisit us compounded. Silence hardens positions, deepens rifts, and destroys relationships. It may avoid an argument but cannot bridge gaps. When silence is the response from someone we interact with, please do not assume it as acceptance of our point of view. It is because they either consider us unworthy of response, or whatever the outcome, we don't matter to them. Beware of silence, for it can also strike back. This is by no means an argument in favour of meaningless noise. Silence might be the best option in an environment where it is just meaningless noise that prevails over sanity. It is pointless to waste sane silence on the insanely irrational. The wise make no noise, but they shun silence when required.  

Individually, the loss silence inflicts will be limited to the person and those immediately around. When silence becomes the trait of a society, it has serious repercussions. Collective silence puts an axe to the very roots of that society. Silence, for all the name it carries, does not arrive quietly or by accident. It descends on individuals when they give up the inconvenient choice of being heard. It descends on society when voices are called noises, difference calls for discrimination, dissent is considered disturbance, rifts are ignored, recourse is denied and compliance is chosen over conscience. Such silence is often misunderstood as stability. A society shrouded in silence is rudderless. The calm surface does a good job hiding the turbulence below. Caught in the turbulence below, rudderless ships seldom reach the intended ports. Those in positions of authority often justify their inaction to the silence of the masses. Such silence, ignored or taken as assurances, serenades storms that shatter societies. History shows that when silence prevails, it is not peace that follows. Silence is the calm before the storm.

The world is in flux. The noise of a world in an ugly churn is everywhere. Louder than the noise of irrationality is the silence of those who matter. The silence of the wise is more deafening than the din of war and the cacophony of politics. Have the wise chosen convenient silence over conscience? 

 Credit: The picture has been created by Grok